Gatestreet Barn Wedding: A Family, Two Weddings and a Love That Leaves a Mark

Some families you meet in this job just stay with you. Not for a season, not until the thank you cards land on the mat, but properly. Lastingly. Tucked away in the part of me that holds onto the moments that matter most.

This is one of those families.

Last year I supported the same family through three ceremonies. Two weddings and a funeral. I could never write about just one of those on its own, it wouldn’t feel honest. Because the story of Jenny and Andy’s wedding at Gatestreet Barn last August deserves telling properly.

A few months before Jenny and Andy tied the knot, I’d officiated the wedding of Jenny’s brother John and his partner Chris at Millbridge Court in Surrey. That day was extraordinary in its own way too. We pulled it together in just three weeks, with John and Chris flying over from their home in the USA and meeting me in person for the very first time the day before their wedding. Jenny was there, and she gave a reading. A few weeks later, she and her fiancé Andy got in touch to ask if I’d do their wedding as well.

I said yes before they’d even finished asking.

What I didn’t fully understand at the time, though I came to understand it much more as the months rolled on, was just how much sat behind the timing of both weddings. Because while this close and lovely family were planning two celebrations, they were also walking alongside their dad Paul through his own health battle. Both weddings happened when they did partly because of Paul. Because it mattered, so much, that he was there for them.

And he was.

An Unforgettable Moment at Gatestreet Barn

On the day of Jenny and Andy’s wedding, I watched Paul walk his daughter down the aisle. I’ve done this job long enough to know that the walk down the aisle is never just a walk. But this one was something else entirely. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen a prouder dad. The love on his face, the way he held himself, the sheer weight of what that moment meant to all of them. It’s one of the most poignant things I’ve ever witnessed doing this work.

There wasn’t a dry eye in the barn.

Comedy to Balance Emotion

I should say, in fairness, that not every part of the day was quite so composed. Andy’s two brothers, Ben and Daniel, were his best men, and complete rookies at it! Wonderful, warm, clearly devoted to their brother. Also completely unprepared for what “looking after the rings” actually involves in real life.

Just before the ceremony started, I asked them the simple question: did they have the rings? What followed was a very funny sprint across the courtyard, in full view of all the guests. The rings turned up. The ceremony began. All was well.

A Love Story Built on Fun and Games!

Jenny and Andy met at university, in a halls kitchen, over a game of Uno. Andy had very nearly talked himself out of going to his flatmate’s birthday drinks that night, which would have been an absolute disaster in hindsight. He walked in, spotted the only free seat in the room, sat down next to a girl called Jenny, and felt noticeably less anxious than he had about five minutes earlier.

Jenny’s first impression was a bit more direct. “Ooh, who’s that cute guy who just walked in?” She wanted to know him properly. When Andy made a Doctor Who reference that same evening and Jenny got it straight away, he knew something was happening.

They spent the rest of the night playing Uno, watching Love Actually, and ending up at McDonald’s at midnight. Then exams pulled them apart for a bit. Then they found their way back to each other, and for the next two weeks they had what they now call their 2am chats. Talking about everything and nothing until the small hours, with Andy secretly willing whatever social gathering they were at to end so he could have her to himself. These days they’re both in bed by half nine. Funny how things change.

The moment Jenny knew she was completely in love came during one of those late night phone calls. Andy was home for the weekend when his little brother, upset from a bad dream, came into the room. Jenny listened as Andy took the time to hear about the dream, comfort him, make sure he was okay, and take him back to bed. That was it for her. Head over heels.

For Andy, it happened during a lecture. Jenny rested her head on his shoulder, and he just knew. This was what love felt like.

By six months in, they were already talking about marriage. Not as a question, but as a given. “When we get married,” not “if”. As though it had always been the plan.

The proposal came in Zermatt, Switzerland, where Andy had whisked Jenny away after secretly arranging time off with her boss behind her back. He’d planned to propose on a suspension bridge overlooking the town, only to discover it was closed for the season. He hadn’t checked.

Plan B involved a beautiful glacial river with the Matterhorn behind them and snow underfoot. He got down on one knee, told her how happy she made him, and followed it up with the slightly nervous but rather charming observation that they already had a mortgage together, so he was hoping he knew what her answer would be. She said yes, of course. They celebrated with a massive pizza. Completely perfect for the two of them.

An Understated, Deeply Personal Ceremony

Jenny and Andy’s ceremony at Gatestreet Barn reflected exactly who they are as a couple. Warm, grounded, a little bit nerdy in the best possible way, and utterly devoted to each other and to their people. No grand theatrics. Just a huge amount of love in one room, held by a family who know exactly how precious these moments are.

John, Jenny’s brother, returned the favour of the reading she’d given at his own wedding a few months earlier, reading How Do I Love Thee by Elizabeth Barrett Browning. The symmetry of it, siblings standing up for each other across two ceremonies in the same summer, wasn’t lost on a single person in that room.

Writing their love story gave me so much to work with, including the fact that Andy describes himself as possibly a bit too co-dependent on Jenny, and Jenny’s habit of randomly shouting “Thirsty!”, which Andy answers every single time without fail. He promised in his vows to keep doing exactly that. She promised to work on the shouting.

Vows worth every word

Jenny promised to cherish Andy and all his achievements, to be his unwavering support, and to hold him close while always giving him room to grow. She promised never to take him for granted, especially when she shouts “Thirsty” and he brings her a drink anyway. She promised to recognise when she isn’t actually annoyed with him, just hungry and in need of carbs. And she promised to love him, deeply and completely, for who he is now and who he’s still becoming.

Andy told Jenny that he loves her with everything he has, right there in that moment, and yet he knows that tomorrow he’ll love her even more. And the day after that, more still. He promised to keep sharing the Doctor Who DVDs and the endless amounts of Lego. To always search Flightradar with her whenever a plane flies overhead. To answer her animal and dinosaur noises with matching enthusiasm. To always be up for a takeaway and a cosy night in. He promised to give his everything to make her feel as happy and elated as she makes him feel.

The Handfasting: A Family Bound Together

Jenny and Andy chose a handfasting to mark their marriage, and this one was especially moving because of who took part. Eight ribbons were laid over their joined hands by eight members of their family: Ben, Daniel, Kath, Rod, John, Chris, Joan and Paul. Each ribbon carried its own quality: friendship, kindness, humour, love, family, celebration, empathy and partnership. The Stewart tartan ribbon, laid for family, matched the same tartan worn in the kilts of Rod, Ben and Daniel.

Paul laid the champagne ribbon. For love.

Andy’s grandad Ian read The Blessing of the Hands during the tying, a reading about everything those hands will do across a lifetime together. The holding, the comforting, the wiping away of tears, the steadiness through fear and through grief.

I tied the infinity knot. Jenny and Andy pulled their hands free and held the ribbons up high.

The photographer for both weddings was the brilliant Sadie Penn, and I know she’ll have captured every one of those moments with exactly the care they deserved.

What Came After

Lovely Paul passed away a few weeks after the wedding.

I was honoured to be asked to officiate his funeral too.

There aren’t really adequate words for what it means to stand in that role for a family you’ve come to know through joy. To celebrate with them and then, in the same year, almost in the same breath, to stand with them in grief. It’s something I’ll carry with me for a very long time.

I’m in awe of Joan. Of John and Jenny, Chris and Andy. Of the strength this family has shown, and continues to show. And I’m so grateful that Paul got to see both his children married. That he walked Jenny down the aisle. That he laid that champagne ribbon for love.

I feel truly honoured that they asked me to support them through all of it, and I’ll cherish every one of those moments for as long as I do this work.

Thank you for letting me be part of your story.

Feedback

We first met Miranda at Jenny’s brother’s wedding. She had crafted a beautiful ceremony for them which was full of warmth, love and celebration! I can truly say that we had never been to a wedding like it before! 

Fast forward a few months and it was time for us to choose someone to lead our ceremony. While we had a (brief!) look around, we kept coming back to Miranda and that inviting and easy-going feeling she had instilled in us earlier in the year! We met up and it was so obvious that there was no one else that could have done it. Her kindness, empathy, and humour during the planning stages put us completely at ease and we knew we were in safe hands. What was really amazing was that Miranda really took the time to get to know us – she listened to our stories, talked about our hopes and dreams, how we met, how we felt, the funny times, the sad times, what we wanted in life, and every funny little quirk in between! She suggested some truly marvellous ideas for the ceremony which made it so unique to us.

The ceremony itself was incredible. She captured our story so well that you may have assumed she had been a fly on the wall for our entire relationship! From the second she arrived at the venue, a calm, serenity descended on everything. She co-ordinated with all of the venue staff, the photographers/videographers, and spoke at length to each family member to make sure they were all catered for as well. She really did go the extra mile and we cannot thank her enough. She even (potentially most importantly) asked the vital question to my two younger brothers, the best men, just before the ceremony started…. “Have you got the rings?”…. They didn’t…. And while I take responsibility for not physically giving them to them that morning, it is a perfect example of how professional and amazing Miranda is. She just quietly sorted any issues out and made the day run so smoothly. Our friends who came are still talking about how amazing she was and how engaging she made the ceremony. 

We are so glad that we chose Miranda, the day would have been very different without her there. Her empathy, humour, and kindness clearly knows no bounds and she was instrumental in making the day so special. One that we will treasure and talk about forever – thank you for everything from the bottom of our hearts! xxx

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Photography: Sadie Penn Photography

Venue: Gatestreet Barn, Surrey

Interested in exploring how we might be able to work together to create your own ceremony? Then get in touch now!

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